Thursday, March 29, 2007

Ohio State Has Already Lost

The fashion game, that is.

I was promised hot, exciting new uniforms with the new Nike System of Dress that Ohio State, Florida, Arizona and Syracuse debuted in the NCAA conference tourneys. I was promised skin tight jerseys ten inches narrower in torso. I was promised pecs and guns. I was promised a fashion revolution.

Instead, I got this.

Only a slightly more fitted jersey and shorts so large and out of proportion with the jersey that they look like skirts. They might as wear crinoline slips. I am underwhelmed.

Basketball uniforms have to be the worst designed uniform in terms of performance. Who wears loose fitting uniforms anymore? Form fitting is the way to go. They wick away moisture better, are aerodynamically superior and do a whole bunch of other cool scientific crap.

The players already wear the spandex underneath the uniforms, so what's the holdup? If David Stern is open to other performance related modifications to the game like changing the ball, uniforms should definitely be on the table. At least offer form fitting uniforms as an alternate. I bet that show off Kobe would wear it. He thinks he's so pretty.

What's really disappointing about these uniforms not being embraced by the men was that I hoped it would help open the door to different womens' uniforms. It is just ridiculous that female basketball players don't dress like women. I was praying the men's skin tight uniforms would shame the women into wearing more flattering uniforms. Female tennis players don't dress like dudes. Female volleyball players wear bikinis, not shorts. And frankly, women's basketball should be doing anything it can to attract eyeballs. The lady players could even wear different styles in the same color so they would have an option that flattered different body types. If it's good enough for bridesmaids, it should be good enough for lady ballers.

So, thanks for nothing, Ohio State. You've ruined my fashion vision. That's while I'll be cheering for the better dressed team.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

The Offseason is For Optimism!

This has been a slow news week for sports. I could write about Serena getting heckled with some racist slurs. But, frankly, I'm still pretty bitter Sabrina and Stephanie were voted off of American Idol. Consequently, I'm not in the right frame of mind to write about that tennis nonsense.

So, since there's not much going on in sports, I figured I could just start making shit up.

So here's a good one. Michael Vick will be the MVP of the NFL next season.

It could happen.

I'm not so much sold on new head coach, Bobby Petrino, but I'm loving the Falcons' new focus on the QB position. And I think Vick will respond to the challenge. For sure, the gauntlet has been thrown.

We now have three receivers available who can actually catch the ball (Crumpler, Horn, Finneran). That's two more than we had last year (Fuck you, Roddy White).

Vick will be allowed to call his own plays, which he never has been able to do before.

Coach Petrino is challenging Vick to throw with a 65% completion rate next season, although he's never thrown over 58% before. Furthermore, Petrino is stressing to Vick that he is going to have to trust his receivers, running backs, etc. before taking over the game by running the ball. This is a welcome new philosophy. Even though Vick's passing skills have improved, the improvement was negated by his understandable lack of confidence in the receiving core. Unfortunately, the coaches reinforced the lack of trust in their play calling. I'm glad Petrino plans to do things differently.

And best of all, the Falcons dumped Matt Schaub. His presence was an albatross for Vick. And now he's gone. Vick was so moved by the Falcons support that he felt compelled to address the water bottle incident. Whether he was telling the truth or not, it was clearly a sincere attempt in his mind to put the incident behind him. Vick doesn't want to have any thing standing in the way of that MVP!

Mike is trying to work on his image. He still has the cornrows, but he opened a wine shop. The water bottle apology was kind of awkward, but he's been front and center at Falcons' offseason workouts. Michael Vick is being pushed and challenged. Hopefully toward more than 8 wins. Hopefully toward the playoffs. And maybe even toward the MVP trophy.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Random Gossip

Jason Kidd is hooking up with Gabrielle Union. Apparently, the two had a high school romance.

Chicago Bears DE Wale Ogunleye is hooking up with Sanaa Lathan.

Michael Strahan doesn't want to fork over the cheddar to his ex wife. The bastard got a stay on paying the remaining $6 million of the $15.3 million he owes her.

Is Reggie Bush "upgrading" from Ciara to Kim Kardashian?

Correll Buckhalter is trying to avoid paying child support for an autistic child that he allegedly fathered back at Nebraska. The new declining standard of the baby daddy: "If the child is his, he doesn't want to avoid his responsibilities."

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Vick Steps Up and Why I Feel Sorry For the Texans

Michael Vick is clearly trying to acknowledge the Falcons' organization very obvious support of him. Signing Joe Horn (making a grand total of 3 Falcons receivers who can catch. Woo hoo!) and dumping Matt Schaub clearly lets the world know that the Falcons are committed to Michael Vick.

So, all Mike needed to do was clear the air over the infamous water bottle incident. Mike wanted to address it and get past it. Not let it hang in the air like another bad Ron Mexico joke. Well... he tried. It doesn't seem like the Vick hate has subsided. There are plenty hollering that the wrong QB was traded, plenty doubting the veracity of Michael Vick's statement and plenty wondering why he even reignited the issue. This is what Vick said about the water bottle:

"I had earrings in it, and I had jewelry in it. They took the bottle. I don't know what they did with the bottle. I guess they were trying to, I don't want to say frame me, but at the same time look at what I had to go through."

Well, I believe the jewelry in the water bottle part, but I don't know if I totally believed that the water bottle only contained jewelry. Still, I willing to take Vick at his word and move on. Mike is not known as a liar. And I appreciate his willingness to even address it. It's an acknowledgment of the respect that the Falcons have shown him.

He had to do something after Schaub was traded. And please believe dumping Schaub was all about appeasing Vick. The draft picks are nice, but the Falcons faithful already know that Rich McKay is just going to waste them. So, the most important thing is that Vick has the mandate. No more, "Put in Schaub!", polluting the sports talk radio airwaves. Hopefully, this mandate will result in Vick acknowledging the Falcons' faithful on the field and not just in water bottle mea culpas.

And, while I'm happy Atlanta made out like bandits in the trade, Texans fans should know that Matt Schaub is not an upgrade over David Carr. First of all, David Carr is clearly the handsomer QB. Additionally, Schaub has only started a handful of games and has not been very successful. His hype is largely fueled by his position as the great White hope in contrast to the cornrowed, doo rag wearing Michael Vick. So, it remains to be seen if the anti-thug will be able to consistently get wins on Sunday as a starter. From what I've seen, I doubt it.

But Houston isn't my concern. Atlanta is. And that means Vick is my concern. And, still, he has my full support.

The Man Tried To Keep Us Down...

In this case, the Man constituted the refs and the big White boy with the fucked up teeth.

Still, Georgetown triumphed after the Tarheels CHEATED the whole first half. The calls were ridiculous. But I was just proud of my guys for just staying in the game. But, then, UNC got what they deserved - karma. The tarheels went ice, ice cold baby and Georgetown humiliated the Tarheels in overtime. Those argyle wearing punks and the well traveling Tarheel faithful should've had that game sewn up, but with a little Black star power requiring the Thompson, Ewing and Rivers families to join forces, Georgetown won in triumphant fashion.

So, yeah, for real this time, I need tickets to the Final 4. So, if you have a hook up, let a sista know. But whether I check out Georgetown's return to dominance at the GA Dome or Atlantic Station or on my own flat screen, I know Hoya Paranoia is here to stay. The past has become the present - and the future.

For a detailed breakdown of the game, with special focus on the horrendous officiating, check this out.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Caption This

Terrell Owens is practically the patron saint of my blog, so you won't catch me speaking ill of him. And Dwyane Wade? He walks on water. But you... You can say anything you want. I mean... If you don't notice that crazy look in Owens' eyes and Dwyane's pointing, move on. But if you think this picture is ripe for humor, please use the comments section to give it the most appropriate caption you can think of. Please. I'm begging you.

Vote Pam! Again!

Whew! Pam Oliver made it out the first round on The Big Picture's "Would You Do?" tournament. Now she's pitted against Stacey Dales. Vote Pam! You know you hate women's basketball.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Rhymes With Witch

Is it snitch? Is it bitch? Maybe both.

The person who ratted out Pokey Chatman has been unveiled. And it's Pokey's former assistant coach, Carla Berry.

LSU's position is that "any allegation pertaining to the coach/student-athlete relationship calls into account the trust of the university and parents place in the coaches of sports teams. It is a fundamental principle that coaches are caretakers and surrogate parents to the student-athletes."

But the university confirms that although Chatman is alleged to be involved in multiple incidents, they concerned former student(s) only. When did these alleged inappropriate relationships even happen? How big of a deal is it that Chatman got with a former athlete? They are both (presumably) consenting adults. And although it is inappropriate for coaches and athletes to hook up, part of that label of inappropriateness is about unfairness to the other athletes. So, in the case of former athletes, maybe the unfairness test doesn't apply. Who did Pokey harm?

I want to know more, but the case remains shrouded in mystery. LSU refuses to give details or name the athlete(s) involved. Pokey hasn't commented. But LSU undertook a seemingly shady investigation of Pokey once Berry made her accusations. LSU sent an athletic department employee to shadow Pokey on road trips - without Pokey's knowledge. The whole situation didn't come to a head until Berry decided to tell Pokey that she had gone to The Man with her accusations.

It seems premature to put Carla Berry on a pedestal just yet. Is she a protector of the sanctity of the coach/athlete relationship or a mere snitch? According to LSU's statement, Berry, "recently acquired the information." Unlikely, given that Berry had been a teammate and co-worker to Pokey for many years. Berry was a teammate of Chatman's at LSU from 1988 to 1992 and joined Chatman's staff as an assistant in 2001.

It's hard for me to believe that such scandalous improprieties were a complete secret. Still, LSU praises Berry's courage in the matter.

"I commend Coach Berry for her actions, including her disclosure to Coach Chatman of her knowledge of the allegations and the actions she had taken. Having been a teammate and assistant to Coach Chatman for many years, this has been no easy task for Carla."

I don't know what Pokey did or didn't do, but she should come out of hiding. If she did something wrong, she can apologize. If she didn't, she can explain. I hope she's just waiting until the LSU ladies complete their stay in the NCAA tournament. Until then, I anxiously await what Pokey has to say.


Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Howdy, Sage

Welcome, Sage Steele. You are the first Black woman to anchor SportsCenter since Robin Roberts (Am I right about that? Feel free to correct me in the comments). She comes most recently from the DC area Comcast Sportsnet. She paid some dues in the Tampa Bay area. She started on SportsCenter last week. On the show I caught, she called Digger Phelps "Dick Vitale." Nice. Dickie was not pleased. It was late in the week. I don't know if Sage was nervous or not.

Awful Announcing hit me up a while back and gave me the advance warning on Sage's imminent arrival at ESPN. He's familiar with her from DC Comcast and he claims she's good at her job. I'll withhold judgment because I've only seen her on a few shows. Right now, in true American Idol backhanded compliment fashion, the good news is that she looks really great. She's got Mike Greenberg beat out for prettiest SportsCenter anchor. Hands down. The rest? Only time will tell.

Shocking, Shocking News

Professional wrestlers take steroids.

In some of the most adept investigative reporting ever, the AFP is reporting that several WWE wrestlers take steroids.

WWE world champion Kurt Angle is one of the accused. However, something tells me there's not going to be much of a movement to take back his titles.

Of course wrestlers use steroids. How else could you get a body like this?

And, boy, do the wrestlers put things in perspective. Gary Matthews is a candy ass. Who cares if you use a little HGH. That's like taking children's vitamins, son. Wrestler Randy Orton (pictured above) takes SIX different steroids.

And have the scourge of steroids been so bad for wrestling? I think David Stern would kill somebody for WWE ratings.

The meatheads should be considered guinea pigs for the rest of sports. Steroids have been an open secret in wrestling for decades. The wrestlers have perfected how to use the drugs for looks, performance and avoiding injury. They know how to use them for effect and its reasonable to assume they know how to use them safely. These guys wrestle all year round. Consider the results someone looking to get through a season a few months long could benefit.

Some snot nosed chemist is always going to stay ahead of the leagues. Please put the ESPN hacks out of business. Just legalize it already.

If sports were my boyfriend, I would say "Baby, if you're going to cheat, play by the rules. Be discreet and be safe."

To that end, the leagues should start considering limiting their concern about performance enhancing drugs to safety only. Clearly, the players are going to use these drugs whether the leagues like it or not. There's simply too much at stake. Even if they get caught, the millions they receive in the meantime will counter any punishment they suffer. So there's nothing left to do but to turn to the players. Ask them what issues they are seeking to address by taking the drugs and what their preferred drugs are. Evaluate which are the best and safest drugs for speed, endurance and healing. Let the players submit new drugs for consideration as they become available. Then allow them up to the safest levels. Let the players decide if and how much of those selected drugs they want to take. The leagues should be accomodating. But if drug tests exceed approved levels or if the players have unapproved drugs in their system, then throw the book at 'em.

If sports were my boyfriend, I would say to him, "Baby, don't lie."

The lies are what's most harmful to the sport, the athletes and the fans. There are not many lies in wrestling. I know the match results are pre-determined. I know they take steroids. But I enjoy it all the same. Maybe some other sports need to learn that lesson.

You're Still Sexy Redux

Alas, Awful Announcing brings the news that Gus Johnson won't be joining us for the rest of the tournament. For some reason, CBS prefers their big name, high priced talent like James Brown. Nonetheless, I will remember Gus Johnson fondly. I didn't even realize it was Gus. Still, for the last several days, I've been thinking, "Whoever is calling those games from Rupp Arena is crunk as hell." Being from Atlanta, I love all things crunk.

So, Gus, even though you often weren't in HD when you were supposed to be, you did a great job. You're no Anthony Grant, but when you get me excited about March Madness, that means you're sexy to me.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Upgrade U?

Technically, Jay-Z is an NBA owner. So, technically, Jayhova comings and goings constitute sports news.

I helped fuel speculation that Jigga and Beyonce's relationship was due in part to contract stipulations in both their agreements with the New Jersey Nets. However, Hov has the most to lose if Jayonce (or Bey-Z, take your pick) can't maintain their courtside appearnaces.

So is Hova auditioning her replacement?

Thursday night, Young Hov appeared courtside at the New Jersey Nets... with pop singer, Rihanna. Word on the street is that she and S Dot were sitting side by side at the game until they noticed photos being taken. You may notice the striking resemblance to Ms. Knowles. Or recall her similar booty shake videos. But what makes this appearance between Pon Di Forehead and Young H.O. particularly egregious is that Shawn Carter and Rihanna have been the subject of rumors for a while. I can't imagine that B enjoyed seeing her Jigga "man" photographed with another beautiful singer. Maybe she should sue Rihanna for tortious interfernce with a contract?

Maybe J can replace B, but he can't upgrade her. Rihanna is young, hot and Bajan, but no Beyonce. On the other hand, B is not in the same situation. She can upgrade easily. Maybe she'll go back and watch game tape of Jennifer Lopez to break down how that's done.

Still, S Dot Carter is an NBA owner of a different stripe. He is much more interesting than those silly owners being fined for talking about a 19 year old dude.

(Thirteen aliases were used to refer to a single person in this article. Hooray!)

Saturday, March 17, 2007

You're Still Sexy

I was kind of rooting for you, Anthony Grant, but not really. Another VCU win wouldn't have done anything good for my brackets. Especially since I didn't pick the first one, lol. But I enjoyed the game against Pitt nonetheless. And I enjoyed how you shunned the suit jacket during your stay in the tournament to show off your fantastic body. And, as a secondary matter, it seems like you are also a pretty good coach. You beat Coach K and the evil Duke empire. And you took Pitt to overtime. Somehow, I suspect we'll be seeing you and the rest of the VCU whatever-your-mascot-is. So stay in the gym. Maybe switch to flat front pants. I can't wait until your certain return.

Friday, March 16, 2007

I'm an HD Snob

I haven't had HD capability very long. Maybe 8 months over the air. Maybe 2 months with the cable stations. But I'm very particular now. I like my shit in HD. So I've been highly pissed that none of my tourney games have been in HD. This guy tries to explain the situation, but I don't give a shit. CBS better have their shit together by next round. Yeah, I'm grateful for the March Madness on Demand (which is MINUTES behind real time), but CBS better get that HD shit together. Don't make me call the station... I... I'll complain! And I'll say "shit."

Hoya Paranoia! And Other Hotness

Sorry for the absence on the blog for the past few days, but I've been watching the games. You know how it is.

Please join me in rooting for Georgetown. I've picked them to win it all! (Yes, this is largely for sentimental/crippling student loan purposes.) They've defeated Belmont and are playing Boston College tomorrow around 6 pm. All us Hoyas would appreciate your support.

But Georgetown is not the only thing going on in the tournament. There is this:

VCU Coach Anthony Grant is now on my "get it" list. The picture doesn't do him justice. But he's, umm, staying in shape. And, oh yeah, he beat those Duke bastards. Winning is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

And why not kick those bitches while they are down? Revel in your Duke hate to the melodies of the hottest rap song out right now, "This is Why I'm Hot." No... Of course that doesn't apply to the Dookies. This version is called, "This is Why Duke Sucks." It's funny and worth your time.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Cold Water on Your Tourney Fun! Racist Seedings?

Here is a listing of the MEAC and SWAC teams that have been invited to the NCAA Men's Tournament in recent years and their seedings.

2007 - Florida A&M (play-in), Jackson State (16)
2006 - Hampton (play-in), Southern (16)
2005 - Alabama A&M (play-in), Delaware State (16)
2004 - Florida A&M (play-in), Alabama A&M (16)

If you go back further, you won't see much difference in the seeding fate of the MEAC and SWAC teams. Do you see a pattern? There may be one there. And it's disturbing. Are the seedings racist? Both the MEAC and SWAC are comprised of historically Black colleges and universities (HBCU), and it's unsettling to realize that they have been consistently ranked at the bottom of the tournament pool. Are the MEAC and SWAC conferences really inferior to the Horizons, Missouri Valleys and Mid-Continents of the world?

I can't believe the HBCU's aren't good enough to merit the occasional 13 seed. The systematic low seeding is problematic because it basically sabotages the MEAC and SWAC teams. I'm not asking for much. Remember when Hampton got that 15 seed in 2001? I think we all enjoyed that.

And although this hardly counts as statistical proof of conference quality, Consider that the MEAC and SWAC have two players in the NBA, one from Florida A&M and one from Jackson State. The NBA usually has 2 or 3 players from those conferences. The Big South conference, featuring tournament darling Winthrop, seeded at #11 this year, has none - and its not an anomaly.

The selection committee denies any bias, but acknowledges the issue:

But during a conference call Monday afternoon, selection committee chairman Gary Walters insisted no conference has been targeted for the play-in game.

"We have been sensitive for five or six years to the historically black colleges, and that's public information," Walters said. "But we look at those teams and, basically where we feel where there's a certain amount of equality, we like to try and rotate those games around the conferences. We're also trying to look at the overall RPI and all the same criteria that goes into selecting the first four lines."

Walters is saying the right thing, but the record doesn't indicate that there's been much rotation in the seedings.

Obviously, the selection committee has money on its mind, probably more than anything. I can understand favoring known sellers. But is the committee dropping the ball? For example, Florida A&M has about 12,000 current undergraduate students, with the corresponding tens of thousands of alumni. In contrast, tournament small school darling Gonzaga only has about 4,000 current students. The tournament is potentially neglecting a huge built in fan base by relegating the SWAC and MEAC schools. At least with football, the deep pockets are starting to take notice. The MEAC and SWAC have several football showcases every year that attract enough people to fill domes. Even NBC has started airing the football showdowns. Certainly the football support is not equivalent to the basketball support, but there's no reason to think that CBS can't engage its audience with HBCU teams seeded higher than 16, even if much of the audience will be learning for the first time what a HBCU is.

I didn't just pull this conspiracy out of thin air. Doug Gottlieb mentioned "racial politics" concerning the seeding on the Dan Patrick show today. Some speculated that FAMU head coach was alluding to it when he said, "If we're the 65th best team in this tournament this year, that surprises me. I don't think that's possible."

But, frankly, the HBCU's have to turn lemons into lemonade. Celebrate getting the spotlight on Tuesday night. And, who knows? Maybe the selection committee wants to make sure the audience gets to revel in the full glory of the HBCU bands. There's nothing worse than when some dork in the CBS production truck cuts away in the middle of a good song.

And the HBCU's have to speak up. The squeaky wheel gets the oil. If Jim Boeheim is good enough to complain, I definitely think these schools are obligated to speak up about any injustices they may or may not be suffering. How can the committee punish them? Take away their seemingly exclusive right to the play in game, lol?

And, handle your business, HBCU's. If tiny schools like Gonzaga can take advantage of the spotlight and become powerhouses, what's going in your house? TV is the great equalizer, haven't you heard? Every school has access to TV now and recruiting should reflect that. A MEAC school like Howard University is located in the center of Washington, DC. There's tons of basketball talent hooping in the playgrounds right on the blocks surrounding that school. The MEAC and the SWAC schools have no excuse but to let improved recruiting delegate their seedings, and not some committee full of old White guys.

I asked a buddy who went to Howard back in the day when he was a local basketball prospect. He remembered that the basketball program was disorganized, not even recruiting known basketball talent who otherwise ended up as students. And he complained that the unambitious attitude is pervasive. The teams are just happy to make it. They have no real expectations, no goals for the program. Bubble prospects would rather go to JUCO than some school that's not serious about their program. I don't know if all the HBCU's have similar atmospheres, but it's too bad. You can't expect the selection committee to raise your expectations for you.

It's uncomfortable to realize that there may be some diabolical conspiracy going on during one of the otherwise happiest times of the sports year. Cold water on my fun, for sure.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Tubby's Farewell Tour?

Tubby Smith always looked so dashing in blue. I fear this may be the last time we gaze on seemingly endless supply of blue ties.

Tubby has received the dreaded "vote of confidence." Kentucky athletic director Mitch Barnhart said:

"Tubby's our basketball coach. He's done a great job of representing the platform of Kentucky basketball. We'll always look to make adjustments to the things we've got to do to get better. Tubby and I will do that collectively."
Yeah, he stopped short of guaranteeing that Tubby will have a job.

And yes, Tubby won a championship his first year. But you know what they say about other people's players... The team hasn't been back to the Final Four since and has amassed double-digit losses two straight years and five times under Smith. Some speculate that the AD might support Tubby to stabilize recruiting, but it's increasingly obvious that Kentucky might be suffering from bigger recruiting issues than stability. If Tubby can't keep Kentucky Kentucky-like, maybe he's not able to recruit the players that can get the job done.

Well, I'm calling it. Villanova is going to beat Kentucky in the first round of the tournament. I doubt that a one and done appearance in the tournament is going to help Tubby's job situation. Surely, Tubby will land on his feet. I will remember him, looking resplendent in blue.


Emmit Smith is No Michael Irvin

I continue to mourn the loss of Michael Irvin from the football television universe. The addition of Emmitt Smith to ESPN's NFL coverage does not console me.

Not only is Emmitt's penchant for satin shirts no match for Irvin's wide tie knots and 232 button suits, Emmitt is BORING. Don't get me wrong. Emmitt is a nice guy, but he seeks not to offend. And reserved opinions don't make for interesting commentary. I've always struggled to stay awake during Monday Night Football. I wonder if I'll make it to kickoff now.

And Emmitt will be judged on his ability to replace Michael Irvin, which we all know he can't. Shockingly, the ESPN commenter function has proved useful, allowing me to provide the perfect synopsis of this personnel change. ".. Mike was the reason it was entertaining! Emmitt is about as exciting as Ball Room dancing! Mike was like having MC Hammer on the show!" Well said, Rice6161. Well said.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

What You Need To Know About Georgetown For the Tourney

1. Token White Guy(s)

Traditionally, Georgetown has had one token white guy. But new coaches bring new innovation and now we're going with two - Sead Dizdarevic and Kenny Izzo. They're getting the job done and I want to shout out our two token white guys. You don't play much, but you've done a hell of a job doing, doing... whatever it is you do.

2. Touching family stories

Georgetown offers you, not one, but two touching family tales. One of the Thompsons. One of the Ewings. Love us, red states.

3. Star Players

Jeff Green and Roy Hibbert. Your favorite team only has one star player? Too bad. And watch out for Patrick Ewing, Jr.

4. Advantages

Size. Pretty good depth. Unselfishness. Confusing Princeton offense. Suffocating defense.

5. How we've gotten it done

Well, it started it off okay. We were ranked #8 going into the season. We won at first - to Hartford and at Vanderbilt. Then we lost to Old Dominion. Fuck them. Then we won again to Fairfield and Ball State. Then we lost to Oregon and Duke. Fuck them too. Then we won seven games in a row, bitches. We beat Notre Dame and Michigan. Then we lost to Pittsburgh and Villanova. Then we went on The Streak. Georgetown has lost only 1 game since January 17 (to Syracuse. Fuck those NIT playing mofos.). Now we're Big East conference champions - regular season and tournament. The banner will be hung.

Yeah, Georgetown had some ugly early season losses. But the team clawed its way back to it's current #9 rank and #2 seed in the tourney. If the team had not had those early season stumbles, who's to say how high we would be ranked or whether or not it would have been arguable that we should have gotten a #1 seed. Georgetown has won 15 out of 16 games. We're hot now. Recognize.

If you don't have Georgetown in your sweet 16, you're trippin'. If you have Georgetown in your Elite 8, you may be rewarded. And if you have a hookup for tix to the Final Four, holla! I'm right here in town. Trip to the world's largest aquarium. On me.

I will return soon with predictions for the Big East teams in the tourney.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Hot Lesbian Action!

It's been a couple of days and I don't think the Pokey Chatman story is getting enough attention. I'm not afraid to say that the story is the funniest thing I've heard all offseason. Are we that PC now that we can't revel in a little bit of hot lesbian action? Lesbian State University? Poke jokes? Taking the name of this blog a little too seriously? All funny, right?

It is alleged that Ms. Pokey was carrying on a sexual relationship with one of her former players, but are there more? Assistant Coach Starkey said, "There's been 20 to 25 things that are just floating out there.." Really? Pokey has been getting down like that? Had she gotten so comfortable in her 18 years at LSU she felt okay recruiting girls for more than just basketball? She's a sexual predator! This is one of those proud, but not so proud days for womankind. Like when Black girls got King Magazine.

Is this a sign of some sort of epidemic in women's basketball? Sheryl Swoopes got "turned out" by her assistant coach. This is a funny story, right?


But it's unfortunate that the ladies who committed their basketball careers to Pokey are left in the lurch.

And when LSU Athletic Director Skip Bertman referred to the allegations surrounding Chatman, Bertman said:

"The girl did what she did and LSU had no control over that."

"Girl"? Chatman is 37 years old and is by no means a girl. It was more than a little disrespectful for Bertman to refer to her that way, no matter what issues are occuring within the university. I don't know if he felt justified in doing that because Pokey is a lady or Black or both. But it's unacceptable.

And speaking of uncomfortable things, the tried and true double standard rears its head concerning Chatman. This probably wouldn't be so funny, even to me, if it was a male coach and a female player. And although a sexual relationship between a coach and a player is inappropriate, it's a relationship between two adults. And Pokey's seemingly being cast aside by LSU without as much as a formal investigation (although she's still drawing her salary). I can't help but think of Latasha Byears, the LA Sparks player accused of raping a teammate, but never even charged. She was dismissed from her job shortly before the LA Lakers began bending over backwards to support Kobe Bryant, also charged with rape (with far more evidence, btw). The Lakers were happy to spend unlimited amounts on private planes to shuttle Bryant between court dates and games, but didn't have much consideration in deciding whether Byears got to keep her $60,000/year job.

Will Pokey get another job coaching basketball? She won 90 games in three seasons for LSU. Surely, she deserves a chance to lick her wounds in a lower profile program. That's how the guys do it. Male coaches can choke players, lie on their resumes and they get a second chance. Pokey should get a second chance too.

Oh, well. Even with hot lesbian action, it can be hard to see the fun in women's basketball.


Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Vote Pam!

This blog supports Pam Oliver in all her endeavors. So I encourage you to vote for Pam Oliver in the "Would You Do..." tournament (yes, tournament) over at The Big Picture. This is just the first round. She's in a heated battle with Heather Cox. Hopefully, Heather will be defeated easily, but let's not take any chances. Pam loves Joe Buck, but I'm sure she would appreciate your support too.

To the Left? Not Until the Nets Say So

You wouldn't know it by their sub .500 record, but the New Jersey Nets are serious - about keeping Jay-Z and Beyonce together.

There is ongoing speculation that Jay-Z and Beyonce have broken up. He was not with her at The Oscars or the SI swimsuit party. So why were they together courtside during All Star Weekend? The most reliable website in the world is reporting that the New Jersey Nets are forcing Jay-Z and Beyonce to stay together.

According to the insider, "both [Jay Z] and Beyonce are legally obligated to attend a certain amount of Nets games together each season." The insider continues, "[Jay Z] signed on in exchange for a percentage ownership of the NJ Nets ... Beyonce [signed the contract] in exchange for her mother's company being granted the exclusive right to design the [Nets] cheerleader uniforms."

And the Nets interest in their relationship?

Part of the reason the Nets organization made this deal, tells our insider, is so that it could charge a premium for the arena's priciest seats. has learned that a pair of floor seats that cost $1200 per game just last year, now cost $3500. And according to our insider, that dramatic increase is directly attributable to what he calls the Bey Z effect. He explains, "Rich people love being around celebrities, and they're willing to pay extra to do so."

According to the insider, "both [Jay Z] and Beyonce are legally obligated to attend a certain amount of Nets games together each season." The insider continues, "[Jay Z] signed on in exchange for a percentage ownership of the NJ Nets ... Beyonce [signed the contract] in exchange for her mother's company being granted the exclusive right to design the [Nets] cheerleader uniforms."

Actually, this could be true. NBA franchises start in the 9 figures. Rap doesn't pay like that, lol. I'm sure Jay-Z's celebrity status had more than a little bit to do with his ownership stake. Remember when Usher used to be an owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers? That arrangement was mysteriously dissolved. Is Nelly still involved with the Charlotte Bobcats?

Well, anyhow, Jayonce better listen. They don't want Stern to get involved. Jay-Z is a walking dress code violation. And Beyonce? She just needs to cover up. Okay, well maybe even David wouldn't take it that far... He's got to love those baby makin' hips just as much as the next red-blooded American.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Slap Him, But Don't B*tch Slap Him

Please watch this video of John Henderson of the Jacksonville Jaguars. He likes to get slapped around before games. And he'll let you slap him twice if you're good.

Monday, March 05, 2007

My First Guest Post!

The peeps at If I Ran graciously allowed me to guest post about Jason Whitlock. Ironic. That bum doesn't deserve any more attention. But you can check it out here!

Friday, March 02, 2007

White is Right?

This quote by San Francisco head coach, Mike Nolan, was buried in an article in the San Jose Mercury News in an article about the potential replacement of Antonio Bryant, who is currently serving a suspension for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy.

"It's not about the money. It's more about us adding good football players. We want the same kind of guy in free agency as we're looking for in the draft. That's first and foremost a guy that can play the game well, and secondly somebody that's got great character and fits in with what we're doing. But if you go with the second one first you're just going to end up with a LILY-WHITE team that doesn't beat anybody."

(emphasis added)

And, per chance, what the hell does he mean by that? If I still understand the English language, I think that he means that if you value character most of all, you will almost surely end up surrounded by White people. I guess there's no consideration for known nice guy Black players like Warrick Dunn, LaDanian Tomlinson or Tiki Barber. Violent savages like Bill Romanowski and baby daddies Brian Urlacher, Matt Leinart and Tom Brady would certainly be filling up all the roster spots.

Mike Nolan might not be a racist, but he says racist things. It just goes to show you that perceptions and stereotypes still rule the day.

Update: Apparently the 49ers have deleted the quote from their press conference transcript. Whether it's an innocent expression or a racist slip of the tongue, I guess the 49ers aren't willing to take the chance to give more ammunition to the story. Via the Fanhouse.
(Thanks to D-Wil for the find.)

Thursday, March 01, 2007

If You're Scared, Go to Church

A few NBA players are scared for their safety during the All Star Weekend to be held in New Orleans in 2008. Tracy McGrady said:

"If I don't feel I'm going to be safe, if I am on that team, I will look into probably not even going.

When they first mentioned to me that the All-Star Game was going to be in New Orleans, that was the first thing I thought about: How much security are they going to have for the players and everybody there?

I don't think it's the right city to have this type of event right now. I know the city is in need of trying to get back on its feet, but safety comes first. I'm sure they're going to do a lot of research and look into this before they make this decision."

Fine, Tracy. Don't go then. You'll probably be out with a back spasm anyway.

Tracy's teammate, Rafer Alston, also chimed in:

"I'm scared right now, only because of the situation down there now. If it's like that now, what happens when you have 500,000 people on their way down there and people who earn a substantial amount of money down there? Right now, it's pretty unsafe. (If) they can assure David Stern and the rest of the league that the players and their families and their friends will be all right down there, then it could be a go.

I was very uncomfortable (in Las Vegas). I didn't leave my hotel until I was headed to an event. I didn't even leave to go to eat. I ate in my hotel. It was the overall atmosphere. The whole feeling didn't feel safe. Then when the weekend cleared, you started to see unbelievable numbers of arrests and things that went on. You think, 'If that happened, what's to happen in New Orleans?'"

Rafer is clearly a Jason Whitlock reader. How would he know what the atmosphere was like if he didn't leave his room?

Even Shaquille O'Neal has expressed similar sentiments.

"I'm not sure if the city of New Orleans is ready for something like that. I would rather see it come to Miami or even New York.

I don't know what New Orleans' situation is, but from watching the Spike Lee (documentary) special and watching the news, it doesn't look like it's ready for something like that."

Fortunately the NBA is steadfastly determined to see the New Orleans weekend through. David Stern says:

"We're looking forward to New Orleans playing host to next year's All-Star events and are equally excited about the Hornets' return to the city next season. The reports we have received about other major events and conventions recently held in New Orleans have been very positive, and we fully expect All-Star 2008 to be a great success."

It's more than ridiculous that these 7 foot tall guys are such fraidy cats. But they're all millionaires. They can afford all the bodyguards they need. I understand that celebrities need to be wary of large crowds, but that caution would have to be exercised in any city, not just New Orleans.

It would be wonderful to accommodate the players' desires to save a few bucks on security, dine wherever they please and have the game in a city with sunshine and palm trees. However, I think it's more important to accommodate the people trying to rebuild New Orleans and deliver the positive economic impact of an NBA All Star Weekend.

New Orleans will certainly be a different situation than Las Vegas. Las Vegas is laid out in such a way that most places you want to get to are on or near the strip. It was bound to be overwhelmed and over congested. New Orleans is distinctive in that the French Quarter is a considerably smaller area than the Las Vegas Strip and most of the traffic will be foot traffic. There are hotels near the Quarter, but not in it. There is dining near the Quarter, but not in it. Generally, you can avoid the certain chaos of the French Quarter if that's what you want to do. The players can easily stay away from the fray, again, if that's what they want to do.

Sure, New Orleans is a little bit dangerous. All large, crowded places are. I was pickpocketed the last time I was there. I don't blame that on New Orleans. I would go back. It's funny that Shaq and Tracy are the ones complaining. I saw them both out partying in New Orleans a few years back during the Essence Festival. Tracy spent a considerable amount of time looking at my ass. Maybe it made him feel safe.

Whitlock's Duplicity Coming to the Light

When was All Star Weekend? Like two weeks ago? Jeez. I certainly am tired of Jason Whitlock, but I want to briefly update you. The bloggers have been complaining all along, but some of the mainstream is starting to connect the dots. Your favorite ESPN columnist and mine, Scoop Jackson, has written an article not so subtly slamming Jason Whitlock for making shit up. (who cares if I wrote the same thing two days ago without trashing my best line. Scoop writes, "History verses his story? As usual, we lost." For real, bruh?)

And also, the Columbia Journalism Review slams Whitlock for citing questionable facts. Choice nuggets follow:

His sources here are thin. The only named source in the AOL article never spoke to Whitlock. She complained to a local television station, not about violence but about rudeness. The only other source is an anonymous occupant of the MGM Grand, who Whitlock claims "literally fled the hotel in fear" and moved to the Luxor, which, for the record, is only six-tenths of a mile from the MGM Grand. Whitlock insisted to me that friends, reporters, and tourists who were in Vegas with him can corroborate the culture of fear that permeated the weekend. Asked why those people were not quoted in his article, Whitlock responded, "I'm not big on quoting anybody. I'm a columnist."

When Steve Somers, a WFAN sports talk show host, challenged Whitlock the night the AOL article appeared on the veracity of his statements, asking for proof or sources, Whitlock became enraged, saying that he had been to Las Vegas twenty or thirty times and had never experienced a weekend like this. "How is this different than any other weekend?" Somers asked, looking for some context. "I don't know. I'm not a research analyst on Vegas," Whitlock shouted. "Call someone from Vegas if you want the stats." As the interview came to a close, Whitlock repeated, "I don't need any stats or numbers to know what I experienced."

Nice, Jason.

But, of course, Whitlock is savoring the controversy. Suddenly, he is churning out columns every other day. His latest gem is about rap music and prison culture. It would be fine for Whitlock to discuss rap if he was capable of demonstrating that he knew anything about it. But he's not big on facts. He's a columnist.

Hot Chick of the Moment

I haven't done the "hot chick" post in a while, but I guess the choice was obvious. Jennifer Hudson is a good woman. She won an Oscar. Her boyfriend is a janitor (technically, a maintenance engineer). She democratically shared the stage with Beyonce, yet performed like she wasn't even there. I even forgive her for that hideous bolero jacket thingy she wore on the red carpet. But what was worse was that she wore that high cut dress that hid the puppies. Show them things, girl! You've got good, young breasts. Enjoy them. And let the horndogs that read this blog do the same.